I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
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