whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Randomize
