I hate all girls vehemently.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Randomize