So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
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