You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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