nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize
