K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I need a burrito and a hug.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
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