she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
