I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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