last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
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