I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
