doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
