yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
bring money and cleavage
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Randomize
