Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
