i permit you to call me
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
whose parrot is this?
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
