i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize
