using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
