I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
this boner is exhausting
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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