I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize