Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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