YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
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