I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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