My sheets look like a crime scene.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
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