Do you still have your period?
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
