oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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