i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
