well I can't set my house on fire every night
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
