nut hugger
Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
