did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
