Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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