Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Boobs speak an international language.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize