There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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