You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize
