so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
