does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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