i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
