I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Randomize
