my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
Randomize