there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Randomize
