Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Randomize
