69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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