Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Randomize
