Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Randomize