So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
