yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
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