Her vagina should come with caution tape.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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