eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize