Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize