we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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