So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
if i died would you start the facebook group?
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Randomize
