did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
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