I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Randomize
