Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
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